TWO AND A HALF HOURS ON 2965 WORDS.


I didnt realise that i typed so much :/


i am waaaay sleepy now,
my bed calls (:
nights and have an awesome week ahead :D
i am looking forward to tmr (cos i did my hw and because after tmr it'll be a long long nice holiday yayyyyyyyy) and thursday and friday !
(:



p.s. i must remember to buy and make stickersss !!!


SIGH!


and that's a sigh of relief (:
today started off really bad,
because i slept at one am plus,
and the first period was, bleaaah pw.


but things began to pick up,
(as they always do)
as i spent class time with the girls (:


haha, thanks tingyi for tolerating my grumbling.
(:
gp lesson was by far the best so far (:
hahahahaha.
and tingyi and i were coming up with awesome animals to draw on a recycled post-it (:
they're super cute la :D


r&e was pretty alright :D
it's over yayyy (:
felt so relieved, somehow (:


THANKS so much 1A04, 1A05 and Andrew !
for helping out with publicity and everything (:
I really appreciate all your support !
-hugs!
You guys're more than awesomeeeee !



aaand then i went for math lessons with sarah and keagan,
and i'm home now :D



gotta get started on the thousand word geog essay !
it's due tmr :S
(:
and keagan,
this so doesnt count as last minute work :D


i might blog again later.

This got me through the night.


i really do not like PW.
and more than that,
i cannot stand your selfish,
i-think-i'm-so-hot,
the-world-owes-me attitude.
give the girls a break, seriously.


i am sick and tired.
and sleepy and everything,
and no i'm not complaining.


i have r&e tmr,
and here i am stressing out on pw while you're probably sleeping,
if not slacking your braincells away watching tv.
wake up and think about your attitude please.



bee-quiet, bee-have, bee-gone.


and dont tell me to get a life,
you're probably the one who needs one.
studying isnt everything to me,
if you think it is,
i'm telling you now,
IT ISNT.
i have friends,
and i dont tell them to shut up of mix with their own 'kind'.
Get a life and wake up to reality.


and did i mention?
i think it is so ironic;
that you dont know the meaning of screwed up.


in case you cant already tell,
I AM seriously irritated at your selfish attitude.
because i know you can do so much more.
than SLACK.


and YES,
I AM PMSING.
because i had to restart the computer 6 times
because the GPP file is so big
thanks to the twenty pages of annexs.
which i am printing.




so please give me a break,
and leave me alone for a day will you?
cos you screw up my week,
seriously.




turquoise magic.
i need a bit of that.


stayed at home today,
pretty productive weekend in terms of maths.
i've got GP compre left,
and sketches for art development.
which i'll finish up later tonight.
other than that,
i dont have any homework which is really due left,
cept the thousand word essay for geog.
but i'll get that done on tuesday.
which leaves me with space, for now.


you should've just told me.
though i have to admit,
that was a pretty cute-in-a-dumb-way thing to do.
and it makes me feel
kind of awesome.







SCIP 2007 BBQ DETAILS!

Date: 1st May 2008 (which is a public holiday)
Time: 5pm - 9pm
Venue: BBQ Pit number 41 & 42 (East Coast Park Area D-F )
Please note that it is before the stretch of seafood restaurants when coming from the left.
(which is a pretty good landmark so i dont think it'll be easy to get lost)
You can get there by using the underpass nearby (:


A sneak preview of the menu -
Chicken Satay,
Buffalo Wings,
Hot Dogs,
Sweet Corn,
Marshmellows,
Bee Hoon,
Honey Sea Coconut
and lots more (:



Feel free to go down to ECP earlier if you like (:
Cant wait to see you guys (:


Oh and bring mosquito repellent if you deem necessary,
cos the bbq package doesnt include that, hahaha.
:D







WORKAFROLIC (:


so today was the perfect saturday afternoon (:
i'm so green, white and shiny greyish-brown today :D


bused to thomson to study (:
and it was productive.
studying at the starbucks there,
in between sips of caramel frap
and messaging germaine makes the awesome-est study session (:
not to mention the lovely windy sunny weather (:
(:
that was enough to make me happy for the day (:


reached choir in perfect time,
had a great practice (:
pretty energetic songs today (:
and You Are Mine is a really meaningful Communion Hymn.


Got donations for the will run too (:
had a chat with jacob after mass,
and walked to the bus stop with maaaarc.


and i really think it's so awesome how you're so happy and smiley and everything nowadays :D
sorry i couldnt make dinner today :/


so i bused home,
and had a yummy dinner with the family (:
i'm pretty excited :D
this week is going to be oh-so-so-so awesome :D


(:
there's rally and election on tues,
math lecture test on wed,

scip bbq on thursday (yay!yay!yay!)
and on thurs it'll be only one week till i'm braces-free :D
no school on friday (YAYYYY!)
and saturday :D


haha, and spiderisation is really a good process,
seriously :D


anyways!
i got pretty annoyed today,
a little.
i get so irritated by people who bug me.
i guess it's not their fault,
cos they cant get the hint.
but ughhhhhh.
sometimes i just feel like yelling,
leave me alone,
i'm busy. -even if i'm really not.



but that's too mean for me.
looking forward to the coming week (:


oh and i didnt mention (:
as i was walking home from the bus stop i saw a snake.
a REAL snake slithering.
and i almost got a bottle of green tea,
cos i felt like drinking it.
and when i came home,
turns out they bought green tea (:
(((:



Dear God,
I pray for confidence.
and more for tuesday.
If it is your will,
help me shine, please.
i love you everyday.




(the quote of the week- Are they pretty ? :D)


TGIF.


School today was pretty normal,
started off with geog on a good note :D
was pretty happy (:


had art, which was pretty fun too (:
we covered the elements of art.
i missed sarah today !
cos my breaks were alone ):
take care and get well soon sarah !


there's barely any homework this weekend (:
which is a good thing,
cos it means i can take the time to wind down
there's
-a few short geog questions.
-geog 1000 word essay
-gp comprehension
-art (development of first-hand observations)
-pw (OMG ?!)


and i wanna practise math so i'll do well for the math lecture test (:


saturdays are calories-dont-count-yay days (:
so that's reason enough to look forward to the weekend (:
anyways,
rally and election rehearsal was pretty good this time around,
i fumbled the first time, but improved the second time around (:
being confident and believing in myself is very important,
i realised (:


this time around,
i managed to get the butterflies in my tummy in to fly in the same direction,
yayyy.
(:


i'll leave you with my song of the week -
No Air (:
we'll see if i find something more in depth to blog about,
from now till later (:
haha.


Have an awesome weekend everyone (:




HTP.


School today was pretty funny !
(:
hahaha, talking to the girls is always funny and fun.
i just got home not too long ago,
and the most significant thing that i can remember from today is the dinner with sam, fon, amirah and keagan.


haha keagan's whole arm,
was, uhhhh, a work of art.
lolll.
it was so funny.
and we were laughing so much, with all the HTP jokes.
OMGGGG.


and yea like i said :/
i have that memory loss thingy,
where i think of something i really want to blog about,
but by the time i get home,
i pretty much forget :/


thank you sean for the surprise (:
it was really a surprise!
haha.


Just got the E Comm list done for the bbq :D
i absolutely positively cannot wait for next thurs :D


this post is pretty much full of random thoughts,
but haha,
:D
today was a pretty random day too.


GP was awesomely fun (:
haha.
we played games..


did the math revision exercise after school today,
and listened to NO AIR on repeat (:
thanks keagan!
it's my song of the week, hands down!
haha.


(: i feel like eating rocky road chocolate now (:
but i'm supposed to cut down on my diet (:
haha, perhaps if i'm lighter my 2.4 timing will improve.
i've been eating a banana a day for breakfast (:


watch this space :D

Is leadership all about being outspoken?



today was a rough day,
but coming through it,
i feel so much stronger.
it's made me think so much (:
about what i believe in,
about how important believing in myself is, as a potential leader.
and about trusting in others,
and depending on friends even when you're supposed to be independent.
friends are awesome.
what'd i do without them (:




and thank you for pushing me with that question.
i realised that i needed that,
it's helped me grow.
(:



gotta study for econs test (:
have a good night!



SAY IT WITH SAM :D
VOTE NO. 11 (((:



this is random,
but my song of the night is,
No air.
by Jordin Sparks and Chris Brown,
haha.

This video struck me during GP today (:
WAIT FOR IT TO LOAD,
IT'S WORTH YOUR TIME (:
watch it (:
8 secrets leading to success !


I cant really remember any which i was specifically supposed to blog about.
by the time i reach home,
i'm always so drained from staying back to study
(which i always do)
so i cant really remember what i told myself to blog earlier in the day.


which is really pretty lame,
but it happens to me.




anyways,
today i didnt hear my watch alarm.
so i woke up to a rush-y morning,
and yes, as late as samantha can be sometimes,
she does hate rushing.


so i had to rush.
and i hated it even more that despite my major rushing -
i was outta the house and flagging a cab at like,
6.45am.
it was raining so super heavily.
so yea, i hate morning thunderstorms.


called a cab,
got into it at 7.10am.
reached school,
late of course.
spent like, 16 bucks on the cab fare.
perhaps that started off my day on a i'm-pmsing-today-leave-me-alone-if-you-want-to-try-annoying-me-today mood.


tingyi is offically my complain section.
(:
thanks so much for always tolerating my endless complains (:




my sunflower sketch,
but before i completed it,
when it was halfway done (:

the day got progressively better after art.
i managed to finish up the monochrome sketch of my sunflower :D
which made me really happy, somehow.
cos it was hard,
and my sunflower didnt turn out too bad :D
drawing sketches of things i want or choose to draw,
somehow always turn out nicer than objects i'm forced to draw.
but that's a general thing that applies to all people who sketch i guess?


the class girls have been making classes really awesome,
and bearable (:
yes, bearable.




the umbrellas on top of the lockers was a pretty cute sight today (:



and i finally took a picture of my locker :D





today made me think.
about myself.
about being a leader.



today i realised that my level of patience ad tolerance is seemingly decreasing nowadays.
i wonder if my expectations are too high.
or if i just feel a really strong need not to disappoint my loved ones again.
or if deep down in the crevices of my mind,
within the unconsciousness of my mind,
i want to prove to myself that i can do it.


and that i'm not just,
airheaded.
that i can do it.
because i didnt reach my aim the first time round.
and because that was a mistake i never want to make again.
and i guess, sub-consciously,
i'll never be able to agree and substantiate it fully,
i've grown into a girl who's really scared of failing.
really scared of disappointing others,
and disappointing myself.


really scared hardly describes it,
but it is hard to describe.
it's like, deep down,
i need to prove to myself,
that i can do it.
that i'm not just substandard.


i've never really felt a conscious need to prove to anyone anything.
but i guess,
what happened with my results was a rocking of my confidence.
and i need to gain back my momentum.
to the extent of needing to prove this to myself.


and i hate having to justify myself to others,
not because i cant.
but because i dont want to have to think about the reasons.





XY talked to me today
and she told me that
being a leader comes naturally to her, she guesses.
she said that she always seeks direction and focus in what she does.
and when she's around people,
she just finds it necessary to still have that direction and focus.
and to do so, she points it.
and she says sometimes she gets too worked up about it :/
she says she doesnt mean to.
she told me that, it's just,
she cant take it that a leader whom she wants to look up to,
isnt as great a leader as the person could be.


and she said it makes her angry,
to the point of frustration.
because she knows that the person can be a great leader.
because she knows that the person just needs to believe in herself.






on a lighter,
much lighter note,
i'm eating chin chow :D
which really reminds me of nivia and the scip exco (:


and when i read XY's blog posts,
i'll be like,
she sounds amazing.
and i ask myself whether she's the same girl i know.
ah, i need a hug ):



sometimes i dont know why i cant answer my own questions.
But i know i always make it through.

i thought i was in a complain-y mood,
but


Painting that turquoise sea. says:
makes me smile even at the thought of it.



(:
i'm off to dreamland (:




the song of the day is. bubbly.
i've been waiting for awhile now,
you've got me feeling like a child now.



i'm back !
haha (:


oh oh oh and tmr is WORLD EARTH DAY (:
here are a number of small ways you can save the earth (:
(i came up with them myself so they might be lame)
and come to think of it,
you shouldnt just do this on earth day,
but everyday!


1.Save electricity okay!
-try not to sleep with aircon, and switch off the lights when you leave a room- pretty duh.


2.Dont use straws when you're buying a drink!


3. Dont take plastic bags for stuff you're buying
unless it's like, twenty packets of something small and your bag aint big enough.


4. Dont flush so many times, cos it wastes water!
(: (doesnt mean you dont flush!)


5. Try bathing in the afternoon so you dont have to use the light
(considering that your toilet has a window to let in light, in the first place)


6. Cut down on tv if not dont watch it at all tmr evening okay (:
-read a book instead!


7. Eat your food on not disposable plates/bowls (:
saves resources ! (:





anyways!
yayyy there's scip gathering coming up :D
i'm pretty excited cos it's next thursday yayyyyyyy omg.
i havent seen EVERYONE in so so so long sighs !
that gives me something to look forward to (:
not that i didnt have something to look forward to originally (:


haha.
tmr there's art history test,
and ct period.
lol.
so much to look forward to heh,
at least there's a long break,
and econs yayyy (:


And i shall leave you with this (:


MY FAVOURITE COLOUR IS TURQUOISE;
it is for the subtle yet compelling richness of its hue that I associate with my passion-
that is, to lead.

right now,
i'm in a super chiong mood.
haha, that's prolly cos i just had a very hardworking moment-
downloading all the geog powerpoints from Aspire.
(:


contrary to what popular belief might be,
i have NOT YET started on the geog 1000-word essay
and i am instead doing research for GP-
the purpose of education.
education for gp is pretty dry, to me.
i rather do smth i feel more strongly about,
eg. women's rights (LOL.)


anyways!
i cant really recall much about today,
cept my breaktime campaigning (:
which was pretty alright
-turns out i was being nervous for nothing!
i think i really need to chill and have more faith in myself sometimes.
(:


and PE 2.4km !
i wanna improve my timing by ONE MINUTE.
(:


stayed back with keagan, samantha, tingyi and fon to study !
:D
did econs.
i kinda annoyed myself with having to rewrite econs like,
THREE times cos it was so messy!
haha.
we had to leave school at 7.20pm,
cos school was closing!


sam, tingyi and i tried taking photos at the track -
particularly jumpshots,
but hahaha, keagan was a lousy photographer la
(and it didnt help that it was already so dark, LOL)
so we headed homeeee and here i am (:


YAY i just finished my gp research
and everything (:
and i am not starting my geog essay yet in case you are wondering, LOL.
i needa do art, shucks! :/
photo taking time (:
gotta go to the stair case outside.
lol.
(:
i'll post the photos here later perhaps (:

i'm in a purple-is-a-nice-colour-cos-it's-the-colour-of-ribena mood.
(:


i just drank ice-cold ribena,
ate ribena pastilles,
drank grape vitagen (:


feels like sucha purple-y day (:



and it's a stay at home sunday for me so far (:
the work i had this weekend -
1. Geog question 2
2.Econs DRQ worksheet
3. Finalized PI
4.Study for econs test
5. Geog 1000-word essay


And they're all not due tmr,
cept the geog essay and pi.
of which,
i have only done two a and the pi.
gotta chiong 2b tonight.
(:
will do econs during my breaks tmr,
and the rest, later.
later, haha.



this weekend has been sucha slacky weekend (:
and this post is pretty random,
and pointless.


oh, and i think sumiko tan's section in lifestyle today on breakups is pretty insightful.
go give it a read (:


i feel like doing geog at the starbucks at thomson plaza (:
haha, it's super de-stress-y and it counters the boring-ness of geog essay questions.



oh and one more thing,
i'm glad we're talking (:



What did people do before umbrellas?
Do fish have a clue that it's raining?
Why's it always fall on
Some important baseball game?


How come flowers grow...
But I just stay the same?
Can't you make it so it skips the weekends?
Does rain mean
That you might be crying?
Is it like the snow:
Are no two raindrops alike?
Why does it turn grass green...
But it just rusts my bike?


Questions for the rain
While thunderclaps are ringing (:


i've had this song stuck in my head (:
tonight's a quiet night,
and i quite like it like this.

Saturdays are my
i-wont-care-much-about-calories day
:D



today's a really slack saturday (:
haha.
i was supposed to study study- i mean,
we only have geog, PW and econs hw !
and i have art but i'm already done with that.
so yea (:


haha, i left the house to study at toa payoh,
then i got a phone call on the bus,
and talked all the way till i was at ljs at the entertainment centre,
did 2a for geog tutorial
and then my phone battery died.


so i came back home to unload my study material
and to charge my phone.
hahaha, i know it's retarded but yea
i told you today was a slack-y saturday !


and since the phone convo,
ahaha, i have decided to make saturdays my i-dont-care-(so much)-about-calories day (:
i am afterall already laying off carbonated drinks for the WHOLE year (:


i have to head back out for choir now (:
blog again on monday (:








this is random.


i missed the 14th of april.
it only just crossed my mind that i didnt even mention it.
is that a good thing?



on nights when i'm alone,
alone meaning,
not disturbed and having no work to do,
i feel so happy just eating my kinder bueno,
drinking magnolia smoo vanilla milk and reading the comics in the life section of the straits times.

it's been two months since ZENITH II
(:
i'll never forget it (:


the moon tonight,
it's the same as one of our scip exco meetings which we had one or two days before orientation.
Remember?
when we were locked in school,
and the old clanmasters were locked in too,
and they were stunned that we were seriously going to have a meeting in the carpark (:
haha.
i miss those days (:

i like the way you smile.


today was a good day (:
made me smile alot.
made me glow inside.
despite how i feel about some issues.
which i shall blog about nearer the end of this post.


i shall start of by blogging bout my day in general (:
SPEEEEEECH (:
got pretty scared cos i waited for a cab for superly long,
but couldnt get one,
in the end i reached school riiiight on time yay (:


i was pretty nervous,
i mean it's natural !
it's natural for me to be nervous,
before something important.
it's my mind's way of making sure i dont become complacent (:


anyways (:
the speech, i felt went well (:
eventhough i said MRS instead of MS.
haha.
thanks so much to everyone who cheered me on (:
i really appreciate your support :D
thank you 1A04 and 1A05 (:

THANK YOU ALSO TO THOSE FROM FARAWAY
who messaged me to wish me all the best (:
-hugs!

and the day went on,
it was a break-less day for majority of 1A04.
geog, gp test, history test, mothertongue, maths, econs, cca.
really no breaks,
and two back-to-back tests..
but 1A04 was still as high as ever!


1A04 + econs tutorial with miss tan + IT room
= SUPER HYSTERICAL AND HYPER.


and really, no kidding !
we were so retarded omg.
the line of the tutorial has got to be from sarah LOH,
when miss tan asked for the how beef and pork are related,
(substitutes) she said,
THEY'RE BOTH MEAT.


hahaha, it's funny la!
haha, and miss tan mixed up our names, i became SARAH branson.
:P
and all the funny comments from KEAGAN about discrimination against pigs and cows.
and about buying cows.
and why people in UK dont eat so much beef and margarine.
SO RANDOM AND RETARDED (:
haha, i like.


class was still productive,
so that was awesome!


took a few photos (:


oh and today is KIMberly from 1A05's birthday !
:D
Happy 17th birthday (again) kim !
-if you even read my blog haha-
(:



i hope my speech was memorable (:
THANK YOU LOADS EVERYONE (:
haha, i felt pretty encouraged after it,
with the encouragement from 1A04, 1A05 friends, and random people (:
all the friends and some people whom i dont even know yet,
who told me my speech was great,
that they'd vote for me,
and ended off the convo with
SAY IT WITH SAM !!!
you guys and girls really made my day (((:


even those who suan-ed me, haha.
you were listening (:
haha, i was suaned for being bilingual, derek kept coming up to me and saying, IT.
hahaha.
i'm glad i'm done with the speech yay (:


once again (:
thank you all so so much for supporting me so far (:
your support pushes my passion even further (:
and i really appreciate it (:
i wont let you down!
(:


ended off my school day with student council (:
we had a run through of our break time rallies.
it was really pretty stunning.
i really need to prepare myself,
and be stronger and more sure of what i'm saying.
be sure of what i believe in,
and be able to articulate what i believe in (:


(:
headed after council for dinner with tingyi (:
double storey !
but the western food stall was closed ):
so we ate other stuff instead.
haha, sourplum lime and teh peng !


talked bout random stuff and stuff (:
hahaha.
went home after that,
and here i am (:



i have something more substantial to blog about,
i shall continue after this,
but right now,
i need a break.


hahaha, i shall go look for a picture which suits my mood for today (:
BE RIGHT BACK :D

there are two issues i want to type out. here goes.

issue number 1.

Maslow's theory of an individuals hierarchy of needs.


i was particularly appalled,
upon the finding out of something not so pleasant today.
i was appalled.


seriously.
if i could explicitly state it i would,
but that wouldnt be very nice,
so i'm not going to.
it's something to do with someone insulting maslow's theory through actions.




issue number 2.


when i was in tj,
i learnt alot of things.
i learnt that, i cant always have things my way.
i learnt that i'm not always right,
but that's okay because i dont have to always be right.
people learn from mistakes.
it makes them stronger.
it makes them realise that anyone can give up,
it's the easiest thing in the world to do.
But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart,
that's true strength.


some mistakes hit people hard,
but that's a wake up call.
it's a wake up call which the person prolly needed.
it's a wake up call, that with the right motivation,
sets you in the right direction.
sets you headed towards a goal,
a goal which YOU your ownself know inside out,
it is after all,
YOUR goal.
no one is going to grab a chair, sit you down and force you to make it your goal.
it is YOUR CHOICE.


sometimes,
we make the wrong choices,
but that's okay too!
because we learn from these mistakes.
we might not be able to turn back time,
but these mistakes influence change.


people change after making mistakes.
change in terms of personality, attitude, views and general way of thought even.
but this change is not so much influenced by the mistakes we make,
but by instead,
the choices we make.


we make choices,
we choose what we feel is best.
no matter what others say,
the final choice is ours.
and no one had a greater influence over this choice than ourselves,
it is afterall, our choice for a reason.


when i think back on my experiences.
i realised that my choices,
have been based on me trying to protect myself.
trying to protect myself from the feelings which despise.
the feelings which make me cry.
the feelings which are, to put it simply, awful.
and at times, even demeaning.



i made the choices i made,
i am the girl i am today,
because of my choices.


you might not know what i've been through,
you are in no position to criticise who i am today.
you didnt know me before.
you have no idea how i feel sometimes.
you have no idea how i felt.
how can you criticise who i am so easily.
your criticism might not be baseless to you,
but to me, it is.


and to me,
it is unfair.




but i know that life isnt a bed or roses,
and i cant expect things to go my way.
it's when you're put against the current that you learn to fight it.


storms make trees take deeper roots.

i'm in a sometimes-i-think-too-much-is-that-a-good-or-bad-thing-? mood.




there's a girl i know very well.
and she's been in a muddle.


every day she asks herself-
do i miss you?
and then she thinks whether she just miss the idea of having someone who i can rely on.
someone to love.
someone to whom she can say,
i miss you,
i love you,
you make me smile.


then she goes to your blog.
and all those old posts.
make her remember so clearly.
she wonders if she's stuck in a time warp.
all the times when she felt so secure.
all the times when she made things better.
when she convinced you that things would be alright.
because she really cared about you.


at the same time,
she reads your blog.
she reads a post which she posted for you.
and she smiles,
cos you typed all of that.
and when she reaches the end of the post,
she reads that she typed it pretending to be you while you were on holiday.
and she's like,
omg; i dont remember this.


she thinks back.
and she truly meant what she said.
i mean,
she tolerated so much.
because no matter how much her friends disapproved,
she knew you were someone special.
she knew you were different
she knew,
that you cared about her too.


and she thinks now,
and she thinks hard.
and she realises;
that she knew how much you cared about her,
only as much as she wanted you to .
only as much as she needed you to.


and that makes sense.
that makes perfect sense.



and then there are times when she asks herself,
whether she's just saying that to make herself feel better.
but she knows that the answer is no.





i cant believe myself sometimes.
or maybe,
i just cant live with the mistakes i make.


on a much less emo-y note,
we're going out for dinner cos it's mummy's birthday (:
and campaigning around the school with the sticks have been alright.


tmr morning i'm the first speaker,
i'm excited and nervous all at the same time,
i cant wait for it to be over (:



and she smiles again.
she somehow always manages to find another reason to smile.
last night, you made her smile and feel special,
when you told her on the phone that she was missed.



THANK YOU for the listening (and talking.)
(:
you might have an idea or estimation of how much i miss seeing you around,
but i'm telling you,
it's nowhere near how much i really miss being able to be by your side, literally and figuratively.
you're really someone i can have a heart-to-heart talk without worrying.
-hugs.

it's the brighten-your-face-and-make-you-feel-like-you're-glowing smile.



SR OLYMPICS.


was really pretty awesome (:
it started off pretty boring,
and the group of us 1A04 girls just walked around school,
publicising for my campaign (:
SAY IT WITH SAM,
VOTE NUMBER 11 !
which was great (:
thanks so much girls :D
love !


tingyi was the EMCEE for the event,
along with another girl,
haha.
she did a more-than-GREAT job!
i'm not sure if tingyi's sick of hearing of her own voice though :P



then we watched soccer matches at the gallery,
while publicising (:
and we ate animal biscuits!
sooooo cute okay (:

the horse and the dog were the cutest :D
and haha,
eyecandy -
LOLLLL.
so yea, we eyecandied (process by which one watches his/her eyecandy) for a sometime,
then we headed to the cafe for lunch (:
practised my speech yay (:
thanks for listening to me repeat it!


then headed to the SAC to play CHESS with keagan !
i havent played in so long it was so awesome playing again.
i re-realised my affinity for chess,
hasnt died yet :D
i miss playing chess in ij !
i miss mr tu!
anyways, playing chess was fun,
though we didnt have much time,
so i had to be a pain and rush keagan -
(sorryy keagan! i must have sounded really annoyinggg.)


after awhile, we headed to the gallery for the finale races!
we were HIGH.
we were seriously HIGH omg.
we were cheering for pegasus at the top of our lungs :D
it was awesome-
the energy in the air was awesome.
haha.
(everyone around us must have thought we were CRAAAZY)


can you spot us !
haha.
(hint:LOOK FOR KEAGAN :D)
we had to head to the hall for the street battle :D
haha, we were high!
we kept cheering and stuff,
i guess the people around us must have been pretty embarrassed :p
then after much cheering or rather, voice straining,
sr olympics was o-v-e-r.
(:
headed to our lockers to get our stuff,
then headed homeeee :D


and here i am now (:
today was great.
i got pretty emo in between,
but cheering kept me happy :D


daddy bought chocolate cake for mummy's birthday tomorrow from awfully chocolate,
and he got chocolate icecream too (:
it's SO AWESOME :D
(and i think awesome is my word of the day)
i know i shouldnt be eating chocolate,
but i just realised i havent eaten anything today
(cept for a banana and a few m&ms and biscuit animals)
plus i cycled over two miles today,
so i guess i can compromise the calories :D




and that's all that matters.





come hug.


today i am in a complete blog rush,
because i have something important to do!
so, i'm going to just randomly blog stuff,
and i hope it's not too random and un-linked for you to understand.


10-2=8 things worth typing in random and not in running order.


1. CT period was ......interesting, for the lack of a better word.
like omg, so gross.
the pictures of the sti(sexually transmitted infections) were ....traumatising.
and dont base the trauma on my screams,
it was really gross.
the visuals were, omg. more than M18 i'm sure.
purple, blue, black and blood.
omg ):
and mushrooms !
(i like eating mushrooms laaa ): )
it was really, ...traumatising.


2. The talk after that by Louis Ng, executive director of ACRES.
which stands for Animal Concerns Research and Education Society.
His talk was really thought provoking- in terms of each one of us being able to play our part to save wildlife.
i was on the verge of tearing when he told us his story, and how he started acres.
SPEAK UP FOR THE ANIMALS.


3. Painting makes me rethink how complicated colours are.
i had to mix green, yellow, white, light brown, chesnut brown and black repeatedly,
just to get the shade i needed.
this is one reason why we should be grateful for photography.


4.THANK YOU KEAGAN FOR FOLLOWING ME TO POPULAR TO BUY MY BOARDS FOR TOMORROW!
I OWE YOU (:


5. Sometimes i feel taken for granted.
I feel lousy,
i feel stupid.
i feel like what i'm doing is wrong,
when i know i'm doing my best.
i feel like what i'm doing is wrong,
when i know that the very reason why i'm doing it is because it's right.
and i hate that feeling.


6. I need to get started on the publicity stuff omg!


7. I feel like eating sushi and drinking honey milk tea !


8. I spent a long time deciding on what colours to use for the placard thingy.
like omgggg, i am so gonna make sure it turns out nice.



Tmr's SR Olympics (:
hope it turns out awesome,
and that the publicity works :D


Family
Love
Career
Pride
Money


I need to strike a balance between
blogging about something substantial,
ranting,
and just rambling about my day, haha.


It might seem like really random,
but yea,
they're my thoughts,
they're what i'm dwelling on for now (:


I've been thinking,
and i realised that colours are a very important part of my life.
colours represent a lot of things basically!
feelings, emotions, moods.
very personal things.


I mean,
red to me, might be love,
whereas red to you, might be aggression, or blood.


turquoise to me, is happiness or passion,
to you, it might be sickness or smth ?


point is,
different colours represent different things to different people.


right now, i feel orange,
but not really happy.
i feel a little empty,
but not entirely grey.




school today was normal,
no monday blues,
then again,
i dont really ever dread going to school unless i'm really so super tired.
so yea (:
i feel fit after every pe lesson, heh.






All I need is a bitter song to make me better.
Much better.
All I need to write is a bitter song to make me better.
Much better.


this is pretty cute,
it's not random!
because i am council elect number 11 :D


Fun-loving, Colourful and Committed.
:D
today was a good shopping day :D


met the family after mass,
and we headed to Suntec after lunch :D


SIX was having a saleeeeee (:
haha, i was lucky :D
mummy and i got six pairs of earrings- all studs (:
new earrings for school, yay !


then we headed to Suntec and I got a pair of Reebok running shoes.
finally !
i've really been needing a proper pair of shoes,
now i feel like running,
aha.
it's purple, gray and white.
daddy thought i was in the pink mood
cos i tried on quite a few pairs and they all had either pink or purple.
haha.


then we walked around somemore,
and headed back to Marina Square where we had dinner at the Soup Spoon,
the smoked salmon sandwich was yummy !
really yummy.
and beef ghoulash soup :D
haha i felt like a pig cos i finished one whole set by myself
when mummy and daddy only shared one.
(no lunch for me tmr!)


i got a new bag after that too,
haha, a brown and tulip coloured tote.
i hope it lasts (:


i'm home now !
thinking of additional campaign ideas (:
i'm really looking forward to school tmr :D
it's going to be exciting :D


i'm going to get on with my proposal now,
i might edit this post again later (:

today was fully of yummy food.
haha.





went to school in the morning to put up my posters for council elections (:
took a train to plaza sing and met amanda ! :D
we studied for awhile,
but the rain didnt want us to study at starbucks, haha.




so we had to shift to long john's.
but not before dropping by Times because one of us forgot to bring foolscap paper,
and the other didnt have any pens with ink.
hahaha.


studied for awhile more,
than we decided to head to toa payoh (:
lol.
it wasnt long before she had to leave though,
so i headed home too (:





dropped off some books,
then headed to popular for stationery,
then to macs again to meet mummy and daddy for a drink.
(:
it was time for choir soon after though.
yea (:
loadsa new people (:
looks like recruitment was successful, haha.





got my own dinner and dessert,
then headed home (:
home alone 5, haha.




watching grey's anatomy vids again.
seeing meredith and derek so in love;
makes me smile, haha.
they understand each other so well,
that it really gets complicated.
haha, too bad it isnt real.





too bad, it isnt real.



you're over it.


and.

i have happier things to dwell on.
really.
i do.
i'm starting to wonder if i'm just assuring myself.
i'm starting to wonder if i even think that i made a mistake.


i'm beginning to wonder why i didnt feel the difference,
till now.
i guess i delved myself too much into settling down in jc.
that was my priority.
not us.
and now that i look back.


you changed,
i changed.


i needed that persistant reassurance.
when i asked you to go away,
did i really want you to.


or was it cos i wanted to prove to myself that i could live without you?
i'm clearly confused.


either way,
there's no looking back.


all i think about sometimes,
are the last things i said to you.
you make me feel like a screw up,
from so far away.


only because i let you.




this is one of the scenes which spoke to me, alot (:


today was an alright day (:


nothing much happened,
my gp presentation went alright..


watching Grey's Anatomy videos on youtube now (:
it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy
and gives me so much to think about.
and yea, it makes me happy :D


there's no dinner for me at home :(
but watching greys anatomy makes me happy (:


and i'm going to meet amanda after school tmr yayyy :D
i cant wait (: !



so you change,
you get over it.
i'm here now.


Sorry shouldn't be cheap.


so today wasnt as awesome as yesterday.
maybe only just half as awesome.
yeaaaa :/



started the morning with econs lecture,
which was alright.
mrs tan is very effective.
her pace is constant and she is really clear in teaching.


pw was blah.
i dont know why i felt i did.
it was an accumulation of emotions.
and i couldnt take it anymore.
i was holding it back,
and i guess i couldnt take it anymore during break :/


thanks muchhh for being there 1A04 girls (:


after that was maths.
passed with 19,
which made me slightly happier i guess.
still wasnt really my colour though.


and i cant really remember what happened next,
till school ended.


stayed back to study with tingyi, fonteyn and sarah.
we didnt really study though.
i was more of colouring my posters while we were all talking :D
haha, a bee can be so irritating.
it was a funnily fun convo (:


Just looked through my powerpoint for gp tmr,
should be alright (:


speech rehearsal again tmr (:
right now,
i feel like eating rocky road chocolate,
and drinking my magnolia smoo vanilla milk (:
yummy.



on a random note,
i cant wait for Grey's Anatomy Season 4 to be out in Singaporeee.
Here's a video, and my one of the songs on my breaktime playlist (:







hello you.
you know how i feel?
i feel taken for granted.
i feel that you dont think i'm good enough to be your friend.
is it cos you think i'm too not cute to be your friend.
or is it cos i'm not like you?
when you say things sometimes,
a part of my confidence dies.
and i keep quiet.


i am sick,
and i am tired.
of hearing you talk about certain stuff,
have you ever considered how others sometimes?
have you ever meant what you said, esp when you apologise?
you make me feel like you're forgetting me as a friend.
i wonder what changed.
i guess i'm no longer important to you.
that was fast.



today was, in one word, HAPPY :D


i'll give a brief summary of the highlights of my day yup (:


PE !
we did 'explosive' stuff - haha, as mr teng puts it.
we did different kinds of stuff to train up for our standing broad jump.
We ran two rounds for warm up,
did 25 glute jumps - broken up into sets of course..
jumped up the high step 20 times,
20 rounds sprinting up the steps at the gallery
and sprinted 6 times.


it was pretty tiring, but alright,
nothing (so far) can beat our pe on monday (:


the break after malay class, when the rest of the class cept for those taking malay was a good break :D


photocopied my drawn poster at uncle henry's
(he let me photocopy for free :D)
and coloured the words in (:
pretty pleased with the design -
it's very ME (:


special thanks to izzah for writing the speech bubble words for me :D


and after school we had SC meeting :D
Each of the elects practised their speech in front of the rest and the student council.


I have to admit i was pretty nervous-
somehow i always am,
in front of people whom i dont really know.
i spent quite a long time prior to last night thinking about what i wanted to put across,
and i guess that's why it was heartfelt.
i also said it to myself a lot of times and to amirah, men shing, sam, gayathri and hafiz;
thanks for listening to me :D


it gave me a boost in my confidence when i finished my speech -
with the comments and stuff.
i found it pretty funny that i ended exactly in one minute (and two milliseconds)
makes me wonder if i really am that much of a perfectionist.
(haha, i bet keagan is gonna comment if he reads this part.)


anyways yea :D
i'm really happy cos i got through with it,
i wasnt entirely sure how it would go at first,
as i said, i was nervous and stuff,
but yay :D


makes me somehow very happy today :D
i feel like blowing bubbles :D
blowing bubbles is, to me, a happy happy thing.


and i'm still happy eventhough i was so hungry after cca and i was in sucha rush to meet my family for dinner that i left my stinky shoebag in my locker :/


aaanyways, this is random-
hahaha, someone told me,
at 7pm today,
that i'm the one who smells like a flower.
LOL.
(i had pe today !)


something random again,
hahaha i'm apparently the 1A04 kan chiong spider.
LOL, not self proclaimed !
totally denied.
haha, tsk keagan.
in my defence, i havent done tutorial 4 okay !
and i havent touched the geog essay !
and i havent done the econs essay too !
:D
(eventhough they're all not due yet, of course..LOL)



i'm feeling particularly smile-y tonight yay (:
it's been an awesome day :D



i shall not ruin the mood of this post by saying something which i wanna say, LOL.
instead, i shall end of with a smile;



:))))

"Words and hearts should be handled with care for words when spoken and hearts when broken are the hardest things to repair.”



I've been looking for a quote that really speaks to me,
though i havent found the right one yet :/


It has to have that spark (:
and i wont stop till i find it (:


i've dont two more pages for art yay (:
should be alright la, i guess.
haha.


okay,
back to quote searching for me.


If anyone can find a good one,
dont hesitate to msg me of smth k (:






Hey girlfriend !
i love you very much.
and i want you to know that i am here for you,
as i will always be.
i only wish i could really be with you :/


take loadsa care alright?
and smileeee (:
because with your smile, you make life more beautiful.


-hugssssss.
i love you and miss you everyday.




msn needs a profile thingy that says, extremely busy :)
haha, i love this photo which i took (:
it's from our art syf piece (:



anyways !
i really like this photo,
because it makes me feel so much happier always!
and laura's lovely email makes me feel so much smiley-er now yayyyy !
(my brother's friends are also going downstairs so that means peace and quiet yay)


but i still wanna sit at the starbucks and thomson and just chill.
but i can because i have to go and collect the cake for my brother and after that it'll be too late which is so irritating ):


i am feeling particularly complain-y today for some reason or other :/


edit.


i just found out that we dont need to do question 9 for gp, yay !


and shucks !
i also just found out that pi is due, TOMORROW.


EDIT TWO.


I'm done with PI omg, I AM SO HAPPY :D
ah i feel so productive today, heh.


and i asked marcus for his view on saturday's date -
he said this


"word of the day was amazing haha.
amazed how big the place was.
amazed at how gorgeous you both were haha. ( loved your top and shoes btw)
amazed how just listening to the two of you made me smile so much.

and i managed to stun another person with my monk joke! ahahaha."


HAHA so funny la you, marcus !
but AWWWW.
i had an amazing time too (:


aaand i have to rush off the computer now !
have a great week ahead everyone :D
keep smiling (:

you never know if you might brighten up someone elses day with your smile (:



yesterday was awesome !
:D


met germaine and marcus for a great lunch at vivo :D
we spent half the time talking about girlfriend-y stuff (teehee.)
and i think marcus is pretty much immune to all our screams and girly squeals of delight at the most normal things and he much know hos very much alike germaine and i are, teehee.


it's so fun discovering that we have so much in common (:
haha.
we spent about three hours walking around randomly and at White Dog Cafe,
just talking, laughing, screaming.
haha :D
and it was really fun (:


i love you both !
thanks for an awesome afternoon yesterday (:


and on a side note,
when we ate at White Dog Cafe yesterday,
we sat at the same place,
same table,
i ate the same thing as i always used to.
and i told them that.
and when i told them,
i didnt feel regret.
i didnt feel alone.
i felt happy to have been part of all those special moments we used to have.
i know now that i sometimes seem almost apathetic towards you,
and you, surely, to me,
i guess it was my iniative and looking back on that is a wasted thought.
i dont know what to do about it,
and i when i think about it,
i feel helpless,
and happy and free and yet sad all at the same time.
it gets confusing yes,
and so i delve my thoughts into work
and direct my attention away from what i cannot help.
and so i direct my thoughts away from you.
and all this is even though i really want to scream;
but i dont know what to say
and you wont hear me anyways.


sometimes i'm good at living in denial of my very feelings.

anywayyyyy.
i headed straight to church for choir after that,
and reached there RIGHT on time yay !
:D
we had a fruitful practice and everything (((:


my brother's having some of his friend's over now,
and they are so noisy omg,
boys will be boys...


and edwin came over earlier to help me load photoshop and stuff (:
thanks neighbour !

i'm trying to work out my poster now,
but it's really not working ):
it's making me realise that i cant really do photoshop, BLEAH.
someone please help me ):


and i still have to do-


gp presentation ppt,
PI (!!!!!!!!!!!)
file my gp stuff properly,
print and do my prep for art (which is SO MUCH on it's own, omggg.)
write my speech and type it out,
econs and geog essay outlines,
malay ringkasan
aaaand some other small things.


omg.
and the noise is driving me crazy !


today is not a good day.
i wanna go to starbucks and do my work.


ps. i'm sorry for the lousy post,
i feel lousy now, heh.



Today's a happy day (:
Tomorrow'll be a happier day :D


The briefing with Council today was good it highlighting alot of my concerns regarding rally and elections (:


I'm pretty excited about the whole process (:
(i'm number 11 :D )
and definitely looking forward to it (:


Anyways,
i've been listening to short bits of this song every morning on the bus,
finally managed to find it (:



i like that song (:


somehow it puts me in a bubbly mood (:


going out for dinner with my family soon,
i havent eaten at macs for the loooongest time !
haha.


and i gotta decide on a slogan for my campaign (:
any ideas, anyone ? (:




Have an awesome weekend kay ? :D


Germaineeee :D and Marcus ! (:
I so cannot wait for tomorrow yayyyyyyy (((:
loveeeee.


edit!

We must become the change we want to see.
- Mahatma Gandhi


I'm home from dinner :D
Havent had McWings in so so long.
haha.


i'm brainstorming for my slogan now.
aha.
perhaps i should try the sloganiser :p
that will be SO funny.
hahaha.




No matter what,
you deserve to follow your dreams.


030408


i was talking to the girls about a campaign slogan,
and ah, we came up with the funniest and lamest stuff (:
teehee.
so hilarous !
tingyi was really funny and laugh-y :D


oh and the highlight of today was art (:
we pretty much finished our piece for syf :D
the shoes look so lovely spray painted,
and the colourful frames suit really well :D


(:
i took loadsa pictures with the really colourful shoes,
and the really so awesome spray paint
i wanna get a pair of plain white sneakers and spray paint them turquoise
and wear them to school,
even if they dont visually match our peach-yami-yoghurt coloured uniform
cos turquoise is my favourite colour,
and favourites go with anything,
even peach-yami-yoghurt colour :D
-that was such a Samantha thing to say, LOLLL.
and the nicely spray painted colourful frames,
but they're all in my handphone and ):
i dont have the mini sd card adaptor, bleaaah.
so i have to wait before uploading them, shucks.


anyways, as of late,
my memory has been bad.
like, when smth happens in school,
i'll think to myself,
I have to blog about this.
But when i'm actually at blogger,
i cant recall the things i remember thinking that i have to blog about.

haha, yea.


anyways, there's a meeting with the student council at 3.30pm tmr (:
i'm looking forward to it :D



and i think blogging has become part of my daily schedule (:
haha, like somehow my day isnt a day until i blog about it?
something like that.


anyways,
smth i find interesting is how people can still smile on the outside even if they're really not alright.
and i dont really understand how people can say they're alright,
when they know they arent.
maybe they're trying to convince themselves that they are ?


or maybe they think they really are alright,
when it actual fact their heart is very well aware that they arent,
but their mind tells them that they are,
because their mind wants them to be alright.


but they really arent alright.
and it takes a really good friend to be able to notice that.
and it takes an even greater friend to be able to tell them; that they really aint alright,
but that's okay.


i cant deny that i was one of them,
but God picked me up.
through my family, through my friends.
and i love you all (:



i'm going to drink my vanilla milk now (:
i drink one packet of magnolia smoo milk every night before i sleep,
haha, it makes me feel like a little kid again.
what can i say (: ?
it's the kind of drink that makes me go to sleep knowing that i'll have the sweetest dreams even if my day wasnt half as awesome (:


sweet dreams :D



I'm not doing work now okaaaay !
HAHA.


school today was pretty awesome.
i shall blog by the period today instead since i'm feeling pretty type-ative (:


Geog lecture !
the quiz was pretty alright (:
alright means pass-able considering i didnt really study for it.
i made careless mistakes !
haha, pyroclastic fall, pyroclastic flow.


PE.
in one word,
was KILLER.
KILLER in caps.
we did this relay circuit which was killer.
it made a lot of the girls feel like throwing up.
but yea, i feel fitter already
and being so exhausted made me drink loads of water, which i otherwise wouldnt drink (:


Econs was good,
haha i like econs, so yea,
it's always good to me (:


MALAY.
i did my presentation.
hahaha, it was funny.
but yea, i'm glad it's over and done with :D


Maths lecture!
was pretty alright, normal as usual,
aww man,
the next chapter we're doing is functions.
i really do not like functions ):




Today was generally productive,
i passed through the SC interview yay (:
so now's campaigning and stuff (:
looking forward to the following week (:



I'm pretty happy tonight eventhough i've got oh-so-much work to do (:
haha.


and i feel like drinking the passionfruit drink from fish&co.
i cant wait for this saturday's date with germaineeee :D
i have a big blister on my little toe cos ytd some big guy stood on it ):
and he didnt say sorry la !
tsk.
aaaand, i still feel like drinking that passionfruit drink, shucks!

LOL.
that's your daily dosage of randomness from me (:
nights!



Reasons to be stressed and sian ):
1. I have a whole mass of work to do (PI, SOVA essay, Art prep, GP summary)
):


Reasons to be smiley and happy.
1. What Miss Tan said during econs tutorial (:
2. My art marks (:


Anyways, today is April Fools' Day :D
haha.
didnt play many pranks, and i didnt get pranked much.


mark and his 'sam there's a grasshopper on your back (when we were in the HALL.) was funny.
the guys and their, COCKROACHHHH !
was the most effective in getting girls to think there really was one and start screaming.


haha, other than that, i think the would have been best prank hasnt been discovered yet, HEHE :D


GP lesson today was so funny. The two third female joke was funny !
haha, and sam and tingyi and their blingbling post it, LOL.


It was also our first time in the SR tie today (:
Sam and i are both of the opinion that we look nicer in the tie-
as in, it goes well with our uniform (:



ANYWAYS!
i have a mountain worth of work to do ):
(and lucky i'm ahead of tutorials....)


i shall leave you with a quote (which Mr Goh used today) -
All that is gold does not glitter; not all those that wander are lost.
J. R. R. Tolkien

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